Reasoning

I had a conversation with a friend recently who has also been through some serious health issues recently.

She was lamenting and trying to reason the "Why" and "Why Me/Us" syndrome.
Part of the conversation (by e-mail) from her read as such;

"...I just don't know. I am still trying to find justification for all our whole family has been through since 2001."

"...Some are the same fears that we have for you and other fears you have that we cannot understand. There has to be a reason for all of it. I just don't get it."

REASONING

JUSTIFICATION

We all want the above, throughout our lives. Whether health related, job/profession related (lost a job, promotion), socially related (lost a boyfriend/girlfriend) and numerous other of life's moments.

I took some time before replying and did so with the following;

Time and time again I have come to understand that there is no answer to why or why me. The best I can decipher, as difficult as it is to do so , is to ACCEPT. Acceptance brings peace, acceptance brings being able to decide "what now" and to move on. Over the past 30 years I have faced 5 surgeries, not the least of which was the transplant and eventually my current crisis. While I can easily suggests that I am walking under a dark cloud, I honestly have to say that I am lucky. All that has occurred to date could have materialized in much more different and serious results. However here I am, here we all are able to reflect, discuss, support and realize that despite it all we have survived. That's as lucky as one can be and we continue to march forward with the lessons we've learned. Our lives as you know are journeys and as such bring with them peaks and valleys, forks on the road and challenges and decisions to make. The biggest decision is - the past is behind. Focus through the windshield not the rear-view mirror. Also -what have I learned from my experiences and how can I use this to protect and motivate myself going forward.
Lastly, if you read my Blog post from today (finally got around to it), the important message is...Are you the sailor or the sail? Is the wind directing you or can you control the sail and direction?

I welcome your feedback........

I Am Baaaack

Hello Family, Friends and Followers

Well as you can tell from my last Blog, it has been quite a while. Unfortunately the abscence was due to health reasons and even though they are not behind me, I am in a position now where I can dedicate the time to add to the Blog.

I have had the time to think though so look out, there may be some very thought provoking blogs coming your way.

As I had mentioned in the past, I am not here to offer answers but simply share some thoughts and inspire discussion. These thoughts deal with Life and Death, some are deeply personal ones and I hope to share what has worked for me.

So without further delay let's get started with a light hearted topic..................................

Can A Person Die If They Haven't Lived?

Read it again-Can A Man or Woman Die if They Haven't Lived

What would the Eulogy read?

What would the Obituary Say?

Well this does pose a good question. I told you it would be light hearted-

What is Life? and What is Death?

Is Life a Physical Form or Spiritual Form?

Is Death a Spiritual or Physical From?

Well folks when one is faced with their own mortality a lot starts to happen in the 'grey matter' between the ears.

And let me suggest this as well-are we not all facing our own mortality the very day we are born?

Life for a 6 month old is very different than life for a 6 year old, 16 year old and 60 year old. At different points of our lives we are either influenced by society and those around us, or are in a position to influence others. Life offers different opportunities, challenges, obstacles and horizons. Life for some means getting up at the very early hours in the morning, getting the family ready for their daily chores and then going out to work 2 jobs in order to keep a roof over their head and a stocked fridge.

Forget the TV and computer, this is simply survival mode.

Life for others means the ability to work from home, earn inordinate amounts of money, vacation throughout the year and afford the best of luxuries.

Has one "Lived" more than the other?

Is one "Happier" than the other?

Is one's Obituary going to be glowing more than the other?

Is one seen to have accomplished more than the other?

And if so, I ask WHY? According to Whom?

Why is it that in this 21st Century, in this progressive (I am only alluding to our North American) Society is there so much inequity?

So many ways in which to LIVE? and make it count.

I believe we all start with the same OPPORTUNITIES.

But ask yourself this-Are you the Sailor or the Wind? Are you where you are Today because of the direction of the wind or the direction of the sail?

Which DO YOU CONTROL?

And that in a nutshell brings the point of THOUGHT! of CHOICE! of DECISION! of PASSION! and COMMITMENT!

I have been a big fan of the Personal Development field for years and continue to be so. These thoughts I have thrown your way are topics that have been in discussion a lot longer than I have even been around (52 years) but yet even today they still bring to the table a lot of discussions and ultimately some mirror gazing and decision making.

O.K. I need a break, this is indeed deep. I'll continue shortly on this very topic with hopefully some inspiration and motivation. But do take the time to think about some of this, reflect how your decisions got you to where you are. Are you leading a fulfilling life?-and that will be very different to many people.

I'd like to share my thoughts about Thought, Decision, Choices on my next Blog.

GLAD TO BE BAaaaCK!

Why DO We Do.......

What I am about to write is nothing new, happens every day, all around us, some of us even participate in it ourselves.
But being in the state of mind I am it is so frustrating to watch and see.
It goes along the question of...
Why Do We Do What We Do When We Know What We Know?

It really came to mind yesterday as we were heading home from downtown, a fairly long drive. Reesa was driving and it gave me an opportunity to see...
A cyclist weaving in and out of traffic seemingly oblivious to physical risk, let alone the law.A woman driving on a busy Highway 401 and applying her make-up at the same time.
Another individual driving along with the windows closed and puffing away on a cigarette.
At least 1 in 5 drivers on their cell phones, even though a recent law prohibits this activity.
Drivers carelessly weaving in and out of traffic desperately trying to get to that next red light first.
Drivers speeding, following too closely, basically being totally careless.
As I said at the beginning, this is nothing new.
We live in a -
"me first" society
got to get ahead no matter the cost, society
it'll never happen to me attitude in our society
"I've got a long life to live" society
BUT WHY?
What do they all have in common?
In my opinion a total disrespect to the Gift of Life.
So much is taken for granted!!
STOP AND SMELL THE ROSES
DO NOT TAKE LIFE FOR GRANTED
BE APPRECIATIVE - LIFE IS A GIFT
RESPECT YOUR SELF

So much can happen in a split second that may alter one's life forever, never mind possibly ending one's life due to carelessness.

I guess when you fight to stay alive each and every day it gets really frustrating watch people taking life for granted.
Live every day as if its your last.
Do the right thing.
If you know it not the right thing to do or say - DON'T.
So that's my "vent" for today-you never know where the next inspirational thought will come from-but usually its right in front of us.

Que Cera Cera

I was looking for inspiration for this next entry and it came as I was watching a movie on tv and in the background was the famous Doris Day song "Que Sera Sera".
Part of the lyrics goes as follows

"...whatever will be, will be, the future's not our to see, que era sera..."

So two conflicting thoughts came to my mind in relation to "...the future's not ours to see..."

The Future Absolutely Must Be Yours to See.

When making plans or setting goals for the future, such as start a business, go back to school, change careers, improve your fitness,

ANY goal whatsoever,

one of the most critical things you need to do is to START with THE END IN MIND.

In other words,

SEE The Future,

VISUALIZE yourself in the Future

In your mind's eye you MUST see yourself at that point in the future that you are looking to achieve.

Its the old BE-DO-HAVE theory.

BE what/ who/where you want to BE,

Do whatever you need to DO,

in order to HAVE whatever it is you wish to HAVE.

This is a critical excercise that will help build the passion and desire to accomplish.

VISUALIZE

BELIEVE

BE PASSIONATE

TAKE ACTION

The conflicting thought is exactly what the song says "...whatever will be..."

You see along the journey of accomplishment you will encounter bumps on the road, you will encounter "Nay Sayers", you will run into self doubt,

because "...the future is not ours to see...", who knows whar obstacles you may encounter.

So now what do you do...???

I challenge everyone to acknowledge this very simple, but TRUE fact;

The ONLY thing we can control is our thought.

It is what will sustain us through difficult times,

it is what will compell us to do, say, react to certain situations,

it is what will lead us through the future.

To quote W. Mitchell-

"Its Not What Happens To You Its What You Do About It".

THOUGHT-Its ALL you can CONTROL!!.

By the way I have yet to start my "Lessons I Learned..." Coming Soon.

Lastly for a short YOTUBE Video of Doris Day singing Que Cera Cera visit

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j6AK7mRfeT8

Michaelangelo's David

So the story goes that a number of artists were presented with this large slab of stone and asked to create something of it. This large slab went from artist to artist all of whom could not find or think of what to do with it.

Eventually this large slab of stone got to Michaelangelo who took on the task and started chiseling away at it and eventually created the famous Statue of David.

When asked how he conceived of such a beatiful work of art he responded by saying ...I didn't, it was already inside, I just had to find it...

Whats the moral of the story...???

Think of little children-how innocent, happy, adventurous and unaffraid they are.

As the years pass by though and they grow into adults these "layers" start to build up, to surround the "child".

These layers are comprised of fear, judgement, criticism, uncertainty, lack of confidence, lack of adventure and so much more.
The "child" has become smothered.

But the "child" is still there, still inside everyone.
You just have to chisel away at all those layers to find it.

If you are going through some chllenging times right now in your life, whether personal, professional, financial or health related-think back to when you were a child-

What made you happy?

What excited you?

What made you jump up and down for joy,

or made you roar in laughter?

Discover that inner child, don't ignore your issues, but start living a happy life again.

Goal Setting

Reesa and I have attended numerous "Personal Development" or "Motivational" seminars throughout our Professional careers. We always come away energized and invigorated as these sessions are designed to do. Inevitably all of the "moderators"/"coaches" throw out an excercise for eveyone to do and it surrounds goal setting.

This excercise in to plan 10/20/50 or 100 things you want to do before you die.

QUESTION.......

How Long Do You Give Yourself..."before you die," that is?

Do you give yourself 10 years, 15 years, 20 years, 50 years?

Well the truth is that one NEVER knows!

Rather than worrying about "how long" I suggest you write down these goals and then "Enjoy The Journey", to paraphrase my brother's suggestion.

Setting a time limited goal is certainly good for some activities but does create undue pressure to achieve within that frame.

Remember that Life is a Journey and achieving goals are journeys within the journey-so ENJOY.

See You Later.....

So have you paid attention to the words we use "automatically" when we part ways from someone, from a meeting, a friend, etc. Words such as "see you later", "I'll call you later/tonight/tomorrow/next week...", and so on.
You get the drift.
But my point is...


Says Who?
Who says there will be a later, tonight, tomorrow, etc.
Now I am not being morbid here but the fact of the matter is;
We Only Have But TODAY!!!
or better yet
We Only Have the NOW!!!
Yesterday is Gone, Tomorrow is Not a Guarantee, ENJOY the NOW!!.
Yes its great to make plans, we all do. That's what life is all about-planning vacations, planning careers, planning families, setting goals, developing yourself both physically and mentally-that is definitely what life is all about.
But Do It Humbly.
"The Lord Has Given Us But Today"- 2 Very key words-Given and Today.
Life is a GIFT!!
Enjoy TODAY!!
Lastly Remember-

Its Not What's Been Give To You-Its What You Do With It.

Lessons I Learned the Day I Died-What Can I Do To Help

I am very fortunate to be surrounded by very supportive and loving family members, friends and colleagues. Each and every family member pitched in to help in every way they can through last year, and I'll detail more of those heroes later. It is when friends or business colleagues offered "...call me if you need anything..." or "...what can I do to help..." that I found it difficult to answer. It was/is great of them all to come by for a visit, offer words of encouragement and offer help, but deep down I know that while they are all sincere, I could not possibly ask for anything that would pull them away from their own family obligations. And so as these offers of assistance came in I found myself telling them to "pray for me".

Well just a few weeks ago Reesa and I attended a benefit concert by Dudu Fisher, a former Cantor who turned his talents to entertainment on stage and even performed at Les Miserables in England. During this benefit perfomance he would introduce each song with a few words and as he introduced the song "Bring Him Home" (from Les Miz) he offered that

"The Prayers of Many Are Heard".

Well I could certainly attest to that as the prayer of the many who prayed for me certainly helped!!!

I have yet to touch on the "Lessons I Learned". I will begin to do so shortly. I just I'd share some thoughts, memories and experiences that touched me over the past year+.

Again, please recommend my Blog to anyone you feel may need some words of Hope and Encouragement.

Lessons I Learned The Day I Died-Transformation

As my Chaplin once told me "...our brains are not geared to deal with death..."

How True.

We all go along our daily lives, making plans, setting goals, business and career plans, social plans, vacation plans, education plans, family plans, personal growth plans and so on. Point being we are focused on LIVING.

And that is a good thing, a natural thing.

Then one day you go to the hospital for something you suspect, in my case a bowel obstruction, of which I've had a few and all have passed in the past. TWO months later and surgery as well I am told I have less than a year to live.

This is not something I would wish on anyone.

I've had numerous discussions on whether its "good to know or better to go" and I'll share my thoughts on that later. As well as the wave of emotions that you go through-also at a later post.

A couple of things do stand out in my mind though;

I remember reading the newspaper in early 2009 and came upon an article about the upcoming winter olympics in Vancouver and throwing the paper away in disgust because my only thought was "why bother reading about this, I won't be around to enjoy it anyways".

Another incident that stands out in my mind is looking incredulously at my wife when she came home from a shopping spree and one of the items was a 4-pack of Colgate toothpaste. What a waste of money I thought, I'll never live long enough to use them all up.

Well going from those "frames of mind" to now making plans again, looking ahead to the future, is a transformation that took quite a while and one that has taught me a lot about life.

I have always been a modest peron, living a modest life, blessed to be married to an incredible individual and having a succesful career. I've always taken great joy at helping others, whether at work as their manager or at the community through volunteer work.

Now it was

WHY ME?

And now it still is

WHY ME?

When I was stricken I always wondered WHY ME? But ironically when I was blessed with the good news this past January I also asked WHY ME?

I feel that my current situation comes with a big responsibility-one of sharing, inspiring, giving hope and motivation.

Stay tuned for future posts as I take you on my journey and the elements that brought about my Transformation.

Please pass along this blog to anyone you feel may need a "pick me up", wherever they are in their journey of life.

Lessons I Learned the Day I Died-Introduction

On January 19th, 2009 I was diagnosed with Malignant Metasticized Melanoma.

On January 19th 2010 my most recent cat scan report showed "...no evidence of Melanoma...".

On January 19th 2009 my Oncologist told me that with succesful chemotherapy I "may" have a yer to live.

Today my Oncologist and other doctors are using my case in a medical journal and have called me a "walking miracle".

My name is Uzi and here is my story........

I am a 52 year old male, living in a suburb of Toronto and over the next few weeks I hope to provide Hope and Inspiration to anyone reading this Blog, whether a Cancer patient or not. I feel that we all need Inspiration on a daily basis and living the past year thinking I am getting closer to death I have learned a lot about the gift of Life.
I was and still am surrounded by a Circle of Love, one comprised of Family members near and far, Friends and Business Colleagues. They were able to pull me out of the darkest of days and provide me with hope each and every day. Their support, which will be documented, was one of a number of "ingredients" that led to my "miracle".

To anyone reading this Blog, your feedback is always welcome and I'd be happy if you share it with someone else.

I will try and Blog every day and provide insight, philosophy (not to be confused with religion) and would love to hear back from you if I've had some positive impact on your life.